I plead Guilty Your Honor
When I get into a funk, or fall under a temporary depression spell, I am very quick to ‘treat myself’. I will go straight to the ‘same day delivery’ or the ‘overnight delivery’ section of Amazon and just pick something. I keep telling myself this a habit that I am going to break but then those weepies (my husband’s code name for my depression episodes) hit me and I just have to brighten my day….. I genuinely won’t need anything but I will find whatever will arrive the quickest. I don’t care if it is a lip balm, a pair of slippers, a massage chair, a new car… I am getting, SOMETHING!
All jokes aside, this has been something I have been genuinely working on. Instead of opening my Amazon app, I pick up one of my hobbies and start doing that. If I still feel like I want to shop, I go to the next hobby and the next one until finally I get to my favorite hobby, which is shopping. Okay, NOW, all jokes aside! As much as I enjoy shopping, I have acknowledged that it is a vice for me and not a hobby.
I have been getting back into journaling lately which has really been helping me keep my mind busy and at ease. It allows me to get out everything going on in my head without feeling like I am being judged for it. It also helps me put myself in check and build trust with myself. I self reflect and acknowledge behavior that I want to work on and change. Sometimes, I write down thoughts and feelings I don’t want to share with anyone and then I tear the page out and burn it. It makes me feel like I am getting it out without any worry of someone picking up my journal and reading it. Knowing the page is going to be burned right after, I feel comfortable being honest and just releasing my innermost thoughts and feelings.
I have an irrational fear that my paper journal will magically transcribe to the computer and get posted for everyone to see so I feel like I have to be cautious of writing my personal thoughts and emotions down. I am paranoid for absolutely no reason and I know it but I can’t seem to shake the fear. So that is why when I really need to release something I have a hard time talking about, I do the burn journal method.
Make a ‘T’ chart. On one side list your vices and on the other side list your hobbies. Do you feel like the line on your ‘T‘ chart is blurry on with some of the things you listed? When you read over your vices, do you see them as healthy or something unhealthy that you would like to work on? Did you have a hard time listing hobbies due to something in your life taking up your time? What is a hobby you would like to take up? What would be the first step to starting that hobby?
Okay, love you guys byeeeee.
